UPDATE: Please read the comments as the gentleman who is the focus of this story has somehow found this little blog and commented (supposedly). For the record, I agree with him 100%. Whatever it takes to win.
Went to a nice little party on Friday night near Eastern Market. There was a shuffleboard tournament which my team, “JK squared”, unfortunately exited in the second round after being demolished 15-2 (and its not like we won our first match, we got a first round bye). The highlight of the night though was when, during the second match of the night, a guy got a beer thrown in his face by the woman he was playing against.
Now I have seen beers thrown in people’s faces all the time on TV or in the movies but I’ve never witnessed such an event myself and let me tell you, it is a glorious experience. You can’t really appreciate how much beer is actually in a cup until you see it tossed on someone. The guy who received the beer to the face was drenched, his shirt soaked.
Apparently what set the lady off was the guy whispering to her, as she was about to shoot, “Go back to your home on whore island”, a quote from Anchorman that, while some what obscure, you’d think everyone would know. I guess not. Gots to be careful with your cultural references buddy.
Anyway it was amusing watching the beer-soaked guy try to save face. I mean, what can you really do in that situation? Your soaked in beer and everyone just saw an angry lady throw it in your face. He went with the whole “laugh to keep from crying” method, which I admire and probably would have chosen myself had I been in his shoes. Still, thats fairly hard to pull off and you could tell he was a broken man for the rest of the night.
The listen, as always kids, is be careful who you kinda sorta call a whore, otherwise you might end up with a beer to the face.
For the record, and in the interest of equal time, I would like to come forward as the aforementioned “beer-soaked guy” who got a Bud Light in his mug — and not the kind you can drink out of, either. Like any good Interweb reporter, you got about 80 percent of the story correct; I disagree, naturally, with your “save face” color commentary, but I’m not here to split hairs.
I’m here to focus on what is really important: the lesson for the kids. And frankly, Aesop, I think you missed the real moral of this story. After the free shower, said lady demanded her tournament entry fee back ($5) and left the premises, which as any league-sanctioned shuffleboarder knows, constitutes a forfeit. Winner: me.
The lesson, as always, is that while depth perception and deft touch win shuffleboard games, well-timed if ill-advised heckles win championships.
You stay classy.
First I’d like to thank you for contributing your side of the story, it was very insightful. Second, your right, I lost focus on the real goal, winning, and, as you mentioned, your methods did lead to victory so I guess really the only thing I can say to you is I tip my cap to you sir. Well played.
I would like to make out with both of you. Well, maybe just one.
mario, stop posting comments on jakes wall like that as “wouldnt you like to know?”
amen, jordan